Self Important

So, this week one of the PMF's re-emerged to annoy me. I realize that this early on, it is inevitable and contact is necessary.

So a lot of my mail keeps going back the PMF dive (our old mail carrier seems to be incompetent). And I had a slip there to pick up a package from that post office. All very irritating. The only possible time I could do it is Saturday, and I HAVE A JOB, and the post office is only open til 5 on weekdays. However, PMF #1 would NOT give out his precious fucking roommates phone number. "she doesn't want to deal with this". Oh, and I wanted to deal with her droopy ass hanging out in the bathroom for an hour at a time and moving her shit into our apt. and moving in a week early! OMFG!
I was honestly in shock. He wasn't gonna be home Sat. morning to open the door. I had to get his new roommate's number (amazingly not a PMF) whom I've never met, wake the guy up and get my mail. Who is this selfish little bitch? She can't 'deal' with pushing a button to open the door. Unbeleivable.

Oh and PMF#1 is Mr. Chipper now. As he took it upon himself to send out to all his long lost friends in a self aggrandizing mass email. The music people are "on the verge" of hiring him (he's been "interning" for 7 months) he is gardening, and he found a bar where he knows people. He is Mr. Hip New York guy. And everyone in the Midwest better recognize. Gag me.

Anyway, I don't know why he irritates me soooooo much, but...wait nevermind, yes I do.

Hum, so much to write about today. I was in Wisconsin over the weekend, visiting the fam. It was good trip, though exhausting. Getting there was wretched endeavor as well. A went home too, to IL. Our flight out of LGA was delayed 2 hours due to weather, so we missed our flight to Madison or it was cancelled. We had to sprint to the last bus out of O'Hare to Madison. I got dropped off at 1 am at a pitch dark bus depot in Janesville, WI to wait for my poor worried mother to pick me up. It was a bit freaky, but I made it. Went our in C-town Friday night, which was actually fun. Hung w/ my old pal Leah and the cutest (and amazingly still cute) boy from high school tried to get me to go home w/ him at bar time. So funny. So ironic. So enjoyable to reject. It felt really good to tell all the pathetic Cambridge druggy losers how well I am doing in NYC. Yes, I am still a little bit bitter toward my high school experience.

Anyways, seeing my family was great. And our new baby donkey. Cutest thing I have EVER seen. Ever.

Upon my return to New York I found out I have dysplasia CIN II in my cervix and I have to get fn' LEEP surgery next Tuesday. I am basically terrified. It isn't even to the level of pre-cancer, but the doc wants to get rid of it all the same. I have never had anything wrong with me before. This on top of the heart stuff is enough to give me a nervous breakdown. I'm trying to stay rational. The procedure is pretty standard and the risk of complications is small, but damn! I am so sick of people poking and prodding me I could scream. Plus, I just want my mom, but I haven't even told her about this. She will flip out, and I don't know if it's worth it. argh.

White Girl

So last night I'm walking home with A and giggling about something. We pass a group of young people on the street and one of the dudes yells out, "Hey, white girl." Umm? What?
It REALLY bothered me. I mean, he didn't alter the truth. I am white, and I am a girl. But somehow it still sounded derogatory. If I would have turned around and said, "What up, brown boy," I don't think it would have been well recieved.
I got really angry, and I can't pinpoint why. I wonder if skin color as a separating barrier will ever go away? Sadly, I don't think it will. Maybe one day humans will all become the same color, and it will no longer be an issue. I guess that would be a hell of a lot more sad.

Biopsy

Ummmm, I just got my cervix biopsied. I don't feel like it's necessary to go into detail about why I found it extremely unpleasant. Pretty fn' horrible. Hopefully no big deal, but I surely hope I never have to it again. ugh. Ow.

Homesick

Well
today it is raining. a cold steady drizzle. the worst. i hate going out in the rain. just hate it. so i'm staying in. i'm feeling very "madison sick" today. i miss having so many friends. it feels really lonely here a lot of the time. I have A of course, but amazingly, i do get sick of him. and he is worse off than me. stuck home all day with no opportunity to interact with other people. ugh, why is it so hard to make friends? I am not one of those people who can make friends on myspace, or craigslist. i need to feel some sort of connection with a person before i want to even bother becoming a friend. I've never had to think about this so much before. i know people who will befriend anyone, just for the sake of having people to hang out with, even they annoy the hell out of them. I don't get it. i'd rather be alone than do that. i just want a friend like AM, or LJ here in new york. a friend that i can just chill with. and tell everything to, and who "gets" me. who can sit around and read with me and not talk, and have it not be wierd. someone who will get bloody drunk with me and giggle for hours. even if it's just on the fire escape. hum, la la la feeling sorry for myself. hmmm, what will make me mad so I stop feeling sad...


I know! The fn' girls that run cash registers all over New York City. Grocery Stores, Clothing Stores, Drugstores, everywhere. There is this type of girl, they are probably between 15 and 20, really high maintenance though not wealthy (obviously) and they just don't care about anything. Ugh, they are usually having loud conversations across the store, talking about people, swearing and basically acting like they are at a bar instead of at their customer service job. I can't stand them. They completely ignore all the customers, and act like you are annoying the hell out of them when they have to check you out. I have not noticed this before anywhere but in New York. Where are their bosses? Who is in charge? Why can't they treat customers like human beings. The men in the bodegas are pleasant, waitresses are decent for the most part, and salon workers are super polite. What is it with these cashiers?

spring?

Well, it's blizzarding right now. April 5th. A blizzard. Fn' fabulous.

The helL Train

OMG! Today was my first time taking the L train to work during rush hour. It was a VERY bad experience. It is ridiculous! I had to wait 10 min. on a packed platform, when it came, no one could even get on so I had to let it pass. The second train was also packed, but I crammed in. It was unbearable and of course some hipster next to me had a cold and was sneezing on my neck. Ugh. All the shit the MTA is doing on the L line over the weekends better include adding like 10 more trains during rush hour. Shit, they should just build a second L line right next to the first one. I know this is old hat to most people, but it was my first time. I won't be attempting it again.

I moved!

Moving is one the things I hate to do most in the whole wide world. (Doesn't everybody?) But this time, for the first time, we hired movers!!! The best thing in the world. These dudes were ripped, and it took them 2 hours to move all of A and my stuff out of a third floor walk up 3 miles to our brand new one bedroom fourth floor walk up. It would have taken us like 10 hours. I was amazed. I still carried a lot and my whole body hurts today, but damn those guys were great. Anyway, no more roomates!! No more psychotic neighbors screaming and breaking things! (at least not so far). Now we get to listen to merengue and reggeaton (which I love) and get cheap Presidente beer on the corner (my all time fave beer) and talk with the adorable Dominican old ladies that live in the building. The new 'hood isn't as pretty as Clinton Hill was (no trees, no brownstones) but the vibe feels more jovial and I feel more welcome than I did there. Our apt. is "cozy" but we'll make it work. The most annoying thing is that there is no sink in the bathroom, but I'll adapt. There is really good light, all the rooms have windows, we can hang our art wherever we want, hang out in our underwear, and most importantly no PMFs!!!

Speaking of, I just learned something new. These little PMF bastards all have trust funds! A ha! I thought their parents were just sending them money cuz they were depressed or whatever, but it is likely these losers have NEVER had jobs. Maybe in a coffee shop or record store in college, for the social circle apect of jobs like that, but they didn't NEED to have these jobs. ugh, I'm gagging. Anyway, I'm sure I will continue to be haunted by PMFs for a long time, but at least they can't come in my house anymore. woo hoo!!!